Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Ho Ho Ho... just in time for the Holidays

Again, a sporadic but inspired posting.

So, lately I've been saying I need to go jeans shopping. The thing is... no one likes to go jean shopping. It's not fun like buying a new dress for an event, and jeans are rarely super flattering (often too long, too loose in the butt, too tight in the waist, too whatever in the whatever depending on the brand). I think the core reason is they're so mundane. It's like buying socks. No one gets excited to buy new everyday socks (hiking socks and fun colored knee socks are clearly exceptions). No one gets excited buying bread either - the every day things are generic and boring. Lucky for me... jeans no longer have to be boring.

Remember 1998? Remember how jeans were really low and shirts were not tunic length? Remember how this combination made high school administrators flip out and yell and how most guys had no complains over how you could see every girl's thong sticking right up out of their pants? Well... no need to break out your 10 year old thongs, ladies. Whale tales of denim are here for you.

I introduce to you.... Bikini Pants

Ho My God. Brasil... I expected nothing less from you really... but perhaps a little better. Lord this is a terrible terrible thing - in all possible colors. Please, seriously, do not buy these for Christmas, or Kwanzaa or whatever you celebrate. Just say no. Or HO NO. That'll work too.